I thought that with the upcoming release of Opeth’s album “Sorceress” it’d be a good time to reflect on the band. Past releases, current musical direction etc.
Also, the fact that Opeth are vagina magnets. I’m pretty sure it’s 100% scientific fact that every girl that likes metal likes Opeth (to be fair, pretty much everyone likes Opeth. I’d have an easier time listing off the metalheads I know who don’t like them). Seriously though, gaze upon this montage of women who like the band enough to get the logo tattooed on their bodies.
Never-mind the legions of female fans who aren’t as inclined to permanently etch it onto their skin.Now, there are any number of reasons why women might be so spellbound by this band.
Maybe it’s the fact that they’re a group with solid musicianship who can tastefully transition from full on guttural death metal to prog to “artsy-fartsy” avante garde material in a single song.
Maybe it’s the fact that they can do all of that, while still somehow remaining consistent in their work while still broadening their musical repertoire.
Or maybe, just maybe, the lead singer (Michael Akerfeldt) sold his soul to the devil. And instead of asking for fame and fortune (as is tradition in blues and rock music, or so the legend goes) – he asked for absolute power over female metalheads, without having to sell out in the process.
Artistic rendition of the crossroads transaction between the Devil and Michael Akerfeldt
It’s literally the only explanation that makes sense. Because traditionally,  women tend to shy away from guttural vocals and full on brutal death metal (there are exceptions, of course). But women flock to this band like chicks in college do to that deuchebag who sits under a tree, plays four chords, and sings “really deep” love songs. And they don’t dress up like prissy, mainstream boy-bands pretending to play metal – these guys are the real McCoy.
In fact, with the exception of the last album (Pale Communion) Opeth has a solid lineup of albums that do not disappoint. And their recent signing to Nuclear Blast also signals they’re going to be moving in a much heavier direction – which I enjoy. If you’re new to Opeth or would like to check them out, the folks at reddit made a handy flowchart:
or just check out the latest single for the new album
metal stuff 
August 16, 2016 at 11:03 pm
lmao i wanted to say fuck you, but it’s true. I fucking love Opeth and have a vagina. But I have not met another chick who even knows who they are so obviously I am either not looking in the right place, or they’re all fucking online.Either way, I agree with your chart except that I do like Still Life. And Heritage was disappointing as well as whatever the fuck Pale Communion was, but I am a loser who prefers their harsh vocal years. It’s not even that it’s his voice because his clean vocals are fine, but they have taken so much of the umph out of it and have almost gone full pussy.
The new single sounds interesting, but I have a feeling they will eventually just start playing Marillion style prog.
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August 17, 2016 at 2:00 am
You know, it seems to be a common theme. You’re not the first person to say that when I bring up the Opeth – actually I learned about this stereotype phenomenon from a female friend of mine (who actually had almost the exact same reaction you did when someone brought up the girls/opeth connection).
They’re a phenomenal band – and while my gut instinct tells me you’re 100% on the money about the direction they’re going in, I do have hope. Fans reacting negatively to drastic changes in sound have a history of making a difference with bands – even Judas Priest made a disco/synthy album. Fans hated it, and they went back to being metal gods.
Likewise, Opeth got a lot of slack for Pale Communion (not a bad album, actually). The fact that they signed to Nuclear Blast for this record (and down-tuned lower than they ever have) gives me a lot of hope.
Their harsh vocals are literally what got me into the band – I’m a Blackwater Park/Ghost Reveries person myself.
What a refreshing comment – thanks for weighing in!
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August 23, 2016 at 10:44 pm
Reblogged this on Kerberos616.
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March 14, 2017 at 1:50 am
very good! It must be the devil. I know lots of female metal fans who love Opeth, it’s definitely verified. However I also know quite a few women who don’t find them entertaining live, so it might not be the devil after all. The flow chart was also spot on. I’m in the Not KVLT enough boat and frankly have gone off them since about Damnation (though I do like Harvest a lot, in spite of the chart’s prediction).
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March 14, 2017 at 8:02 am
haha, i’m 99.99% sure it’s the devil
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